With his trademark user-friendly, humorous, and common-sense style, John Rosemond lays out a perfectly sound and logical case for recognizing the realities of the teen/parent relationship, forming the foundation, and parenting with the Long Rope Principle. In short, the author demonstrates how mom and dad can avoid the pitfalls of becoming dictatorial Control Freaks, skirt the potholes of turning into permissive Wimps, and enjoy the freedom and rewards of parenting in a controlled (but not controlling) and relaxed manner. Infusing young adults with a sense of personal responsibility, then showing them the results of good and bad choices, is a goal every parent can achieve.Parents can protect toddlers--with their maximum mobility and minimum logic--by pasting plastic on electrical outlets and putting poisons out of reach. But protecting teenagers is not so simple, says family psychologist and author of
Raising a Nonviolent Child John Rosemond. "Short of solitary confinement, you can't guarantee that a teen won't use drugs, shoplift, drink or crash the car. In the final analysis, teens must protect themselves." Rosemond's
Teen-Proofing provides parents with tough-love strategies for managing teens so they make self-protective, rather than self-destructive, decisions.
Many parents will recognize the error of their ways in Rosemond's portraits of parents as "micro-managers" who try to control their children and "wimps" who let their children control them. He offers a compelling alternative by urging parents to be "mentors, who realize they can control the parent-child relationship, but not the child." The author explores critical parent-teen issues including curfews, cash, cars, and cohorts--detailing an approach that gives teenagers a "long rope" to make their own mistakes and also offers "creative consequences" to encourage responsible decision making.
The author offers smart and seasoned advice--from coping with middle school "tweenagers" to understanding why teens are vulnerable and how the culture diminishes a parent's influence. Yet he undermines his clarity with snide asides about mental health professionals and one too many smug and self-congratulatory examples of his own parenting of a son and daughter. These distractions are unnecessary; the book's unconventional and provocative suggestions will speak volumes to parents of teens. --Barbara Mackoff
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